In "For the Days Yet to Come," Pascal Bruckner presents a fresh perspective on aging, highlighting the outdated expectations we impose on ourselves. Despite medical advancements, aging and death remain fears. Philosophy serves as a guide, teaching us to embrace life amidst uncertainty. Bruckner challenges the notion of giving up with age, urging us to test our strength until the end, making the future a time of anticipation and excitement, ultimately a matter of personal choice.
Intro
As we embark, modern humans are living significantly longer and healthier lives than anyone in human history, and 'age' is becoming a less absolute number than before. Yet, we often find ourselves repeating the outdated narrative of aging, imposing outdated expectations on ourselves. This book, "For the Days Yet to Come," is a new story about 'aging' presented by Pascal Bruckner, a luminary of French literature who has won the prestigious Prix Médicis, Renaudot, Montaigne, and Dumezil prizes. Despite the dazzling advances in medicine and technology, they have not alleviated the fear of aging and death, nor have they reduced the daily ephemeral nature of life. Paradoxically, with life expectancy increasing, there is now even more uncertainty and anxiety to endure. Philosophy plays a vital role as a compass in navigating life's uncertainties. Montaigne said, "Philosophy is learning how to die," and in the same vein, the author suggests, "Philosophy is learning how to live again, especially learning how to live again on the horizon of finitude." It's now an old saying to give up when you grow old. For you, who are still in your prime, listen to the story of possibilities that challenges you to test your strength until the last day of your life. Ultimately, making the days yet to come a time of anticipation and excitement was always up to my choice.
Plot summary
How shall we age? Is twilight a time of completion, or another adolescence? Pascal Bruckner tells a new philosophy of twilight through 10 themes: 'resignation, place, routine, time, desire, love, opportunity, limits, death, eternity.' With rich quotations from Pascal, Montaigne, Freud, Nietzsche, and skillful literary storytelling, he presents eloquent reflections. He urges us not to give up any curiosity and to constantly test our abilities, to establish the backbone of life with routines as mundane everyday life often rescues us, to enjoy the present as if we'll die now and yet never die forever, to not be swayed by false hopes and accomplish what we can, and to always prepare for the worst instead of hoping for things to go our way.
The author, Pascal Bruckner, is a novelist and philosopher. Having won numerous literary awards, his works are acknowledged for their artistic merit. If he didn't simply tell us not to be daunted by aging but to challenge it vigorously, it wouldn't be considered beautiful. It was heartening to see his honest desire to become familiar with aging, as he delves into the long span of life in his mid-seventies. He describes this intermediate stage, where one is not quite young nor old after fifty, as a time when desires still linger. He dedicates this book to all who wish for 'dreams of new spring in the autumn of life and to welcome winter as late as possible'.
Impressive phrases
Humans, as animals, feel like they won't grow old until they reach 30. Birthdays become mere formalities, harmless markers. Then come the decades: the 30s, 40s, 50s. Aging means being included in the calendar, becoming someone from a bygone era. Age evokes the passage of time but also makes time tragic. Being bound by common conditions and being swayed by them is sad. Just because I've aged doesn't mean I'm necessarily that age. There's a gap between my age on paper and how old I feel. Nowadays, this gap is too wide.
Becoming old doesn't mean that desires, ambitions, and love fade away. On the contrary, neglecting them can lead to a diminished old age. Therefore, one should not give up rashly. Keep the thirst for learning alive, continue doing what you want as much as possible, and love until the day you die.
We didn't hope for time to stop; we received an unexpected gift. Enjoying the added time is mourning the loss. Life progresses contrary to detective novels. We know the ending and the culprit, but we don't intend to catch the culprit. We even try to hide the culprit. If it seems like the culprit might be revealed, we beg it to hide. Please stay hidden, we still need to find you in a few more years. Even though the last chapter of a book is just a summary of the main points, it remains interesting.
Do what you love for as long as possible. Don't give up any pleasures or curiosities and challenge the impossible. Love, work, travel, and open your heart to the world and others until your last day. Test your own strength without hesitation.
After World War II, in our society, the fact that not all age groups work, meaning they only consume without producing, is a disaster born out of good intentions. Experience and insight usually deepen with age. If older people continue what they were doing or find new things to do, they will regain relationships, engage in volunteer work, and become active participants in life. Then, prejudices that view the elderly as parasites to be extinguished quickly will disappear.
Mental age and emotional age do not correspond to biological age. The only way to delay aging is to stay within the dynamics of desire. Let's reconcile the irreconcilable: romance and leisure, impudence and wrinkles, gray hair and a storm of willing emotions.
A day resembles a person's lifetime, from the curious morning to the dazzling noon, and to the serene sunset. Life's structure mirrors that of a year, with its spring, hot summer, autumn, and winter.
Love is rejoicing in the presence of the other and reminding them daily of their existence by being alive yourself. To taste the joys of life, to pull oneself out of the mundane day by day, and to change the uncertain aspects of daily life, two people are perfect. What did you do today? Even if you didn't do anything special, having your loved one by your side to discuss your day in detail is completely different from pondering alone. Someone who warmly listens to our sorrows and miseries is necessary at all times. At any moment, we can be the ones who listen to others, offering comfort and advice.
Therefore, the meaning of life is a question that never disappears, regardless of the answer given. The time comes to resolve 'Who am I?' and move on to 'What can I be?' What can we do while alive? To avoid fleeing from oneself, remember this: "The shortest path to oneself is the universe." (Malcolm de Chazal) The richness of destiny is always related to encounters with people. Without encounters, we will not gain any depth. Aging is acknowledging and cherishing this endless debt. The people we have met have shaped who we are today. Each one of us is a collective work named 'me'.
Not everything is possible at every age. There is also a sense of shame in physical abilities.
In youth, the body is closer to being our friend, if not a servant. It recovers and moves as expected without us having to take special care. Sometimes, the body surprises us with more energy and capacity than expected. At those times, we feel invincible. From the age of 30, circumstances change, and the body demands continuous attention. The servant becomes a demanding master, rubbing us the wrong way one day, leaving us wondering if it's flattery or worry. Do I need to be more cautious now, or am I just being too fearful?
Review
Everyone ages, and everyone eventually dies. Time is fair to everyone. It doesn't discriminate between men and women, rich and poor. So how should we accept aging?
As we age, there are times when each day feels fleeting. And there are moments when we wonder if just letting time pass like this is the right thing to do. While breathing a sigh of relief as another day passes, there's also a slight anxiety about the shortened lifespan.
I wished there was a manual for aging gracefully. And then I came across this book, which made me think a lot. As someone who feels stuck in their twenties despite aging, I felt the need for a guide on how to navigate this stage of life well. So, receiving this book felt like getting exactly what I wanted.
The book advises to embrace passion instead of restraint, and to embrace passion instead of letting go. I generally agree, but there were parts that made me realize once again that there are no right answers in life. There's no right answer to aging either. Each person's life meets time in their own way. Some lives mature, while others become more difficult. How will we live today for the days that have yet to come? It might be worth looking for clues in the eloquent sentences of the French writer.
I think I felt the passage of years more keenly in my twenties, but strangely, I started to become numb to the numbers from my thirties. Whenever there was a need to write down my age or someone asked about it, I found myself counting.
In this book, the novelist and philosopher Pascal Bruckner proposes a new attitude toward 'aging.' He examines the middle years, not young but not old, starting from fifty. We live in an era of extended lifespans, but in reality, life begins to feel short at fifty. When life becomes shorter, there's a reason to live fiercely, to correct regrets and to strive to maintain what we've done well in the remaining days. It's a fundamental change in our relationship with life.
About ten years from now, when I enter my fifties, reading this book was an opportunity to examine that stage in advance. I had vague fears about aging, but as I read the book, I found myself wanting to live the present well so that I can welcome my future days happily in ten years. It was strangely energizing. The author's message to challenge, to love, and to cherish oneself resonates in my ears.
Then, I couldn't help but think of my parents, who are now in their sixties, and my heart felt heavy. I thought about how my parents must have spent their vibrant fifties raising my son, their grandson, wholeheartedly. It warmed my heart to think that they spent their fifties so energetically. As I write this, I remind myself never to forget the gratitude I owe them and to keep it close to my heart.
Finishing the book and closing the pages, the thought that came to mind was to embrace each day of my life, to actively seek the happiness I can create, and to strive to become a wise elder, not just a number in the age spectrum. I resolve to approach life with the mindset of a young person who hasn't even walked halfway through the centennial era, loving myself and living fully.
Final thoughts
It's been a while since I read the book, and truth be told, it wasn't the smoothest read for an essay, but one thing that strongly resonated with me was this: while human lifespan has been extended, the time spent living in old age has also increased. I wonder if this extension of lifespan truly signifies a bright future. I don't think so, not for many. It made me ponder whether living long with weakened physical strength, enduring the discomfort of some chronic illness, constitutes a happy life.
When dividing our lives into spring, summer, autumn, and winter, I contemplate where I might be. It was a time for me to reconsider my fixed ideas about aging from different angles. It put a halt to the ingrained thoughts that had strongly taken root within me, causing me to pause and reflect. It's a book too rich to read all at once, leaving me wanting to revisit it again and again. Aging life can still sparkle and shine brightly. And it occurred to me that it's both my duty and my right, a matter of courtesy, to make my life shine. My summer is not over yet.
